It has been a substantial amount of months since I last wrote something…substantial.
I’ve evolved. I can’t pinpoint when it started happening, but one day the things that really mattered to me became salient and the rest, painlessly started washing away. I’ve strolled into adulthood more effortlessly than I ever imagined.
Notably, I feel stronger than I have ever felt in my life. That strength is backed by confidence. I feel that I am adult, woman, daughter, friend, and lover, successfully. Everything happened inside, though people on the outside have noticed.
I have changed in the way that I perceive and act on challenge, opportunity and obstacle. The meaning and purpose of the relationships in my life have come to a clarity that allow me to feel secure in the way I fullfil my role in them.
Most importantly, I have evolved and still kept the general essence of what has always been me. Yet that change is so clear. It’s the difference between a person who is stale and unaware of their condition and a person who has embraced becoming who they are meant to be.
I feel happy, and curious. What else is involved in this transformation? What other things am I capable of doing now that I have forgiven, accepted, and opened my eyes to the things in front of me?
There is a new understanding within me. There is a level of patience and compassion that I have developed for myself, that I never had before. A series of question marks, turned into periods. It amazes me how a small dose of clarity rids insecurity, indecisiveness, and doubt.
I’m excited. There was a part of me that always had to worry about myself. I don’t anymore. My thoughts now revolve around what I can do for other people, with this renewed energy. What can I do with this new found openness and capacity to love even larger than before?